In A Year

When people usually say, in a year, regarding something that is about to occur, I usually brush it off as being far enough away that I have time to adjust before they get any real legwork done to make it a reality. Now, I’m the person saying, in a year, and I’m realizing just how little time a year really is when it comes to something about to occur.

In a little over a year, I plan to be fully enrolled in a doctorate program. In a year, I plan to become a resident of the state of Maryland. In a year, I plan to have my own place.

 While all of this very obtainable, I think the fear of starting is prohibiting me from putting forth the necessary legwork for all of it. I feel somewhat paralyzed with fear. I’ve reached the point in which I have to put in work and can’t sit back anymore and relax with the idea of it becoming a reality. So I’m scrambling to my feet trying to figure out where to begin.

 For starters, I need to take the GRE.

 For the past year now, I’ve been telling myself this, but I haven’t gotten any closer to studying for it. Granted in the past year, I bought study materials, I haven’t actually began to flip through the contents of any of them. They all sit neatly in my room as a display, currently.

 Secondly, I need to find a place.

 There’s no point in moving if you have nowhere to move to. So while I spent a great deal of time prior to now looking at homes and fantasizing life in them, I need to get serious and actually start looking for a place and pricing places out. I need to make a serious decision regarding potential salary and I can’t do that without first looking at how much moving and living in a new state is about to cost me. Plus, it’s simply not moving. It’s having a vehicle for transport (which I hope to have by the end of this month or the beginning of next month) and finding a good school for my daughter to attend. It’s navigating nearby stores and malls and seeing what utilities I will need and how much they will run me. The question of need and want suddenly comes into play. Of course I want a puppy, but do I really need one? Can I handle any expenses that aren’t needs?

 Thirdly, I need to get accepted into the doctoral program and get a job.

 What’s the point of moving, if I have no way to sustain? So prepping myself for the potential workload of classes (again) and finding a job that will let me do it all is very important. Plus, I need to be making a salary that will not have me living from paycheck to paycheck and draining my savings ever so often to account for expenses. All of that aside (cause they are very important), I need to make sure I love what I do. The potential of sitting around in a new state and in a new home with no source of income for any period of time is just not a risk I can take. So I have to make sure that I enjoy what I’m doing and not regretting every minute of it and wishing for something else.

 So even though a year may seem like a long time to plan for something to happen, I’m realizing it’s probably the shortest amount of time ever imagined. I have a lot of things that need to get done before July 2016 and while I have an idea of where to start, I’m still not entirely sure where to begin.

 And let’s not forget, I’ve just resumed my online classes this week and I have one more story that is almost done with all its edits for publishing. Oh, and I work and I’m mom and a girlfriend. This should be an interesting year.



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