The most disheartening thing about being a writer and not having published work, is seeing other writers with their published work. The hardest part about being a free thinker and an entrepreneur is not having anything physical to show for it. The hardest part about watching people settle into careers and boast about their great accomplishments is being stuck saying you are still working on your own.
The issue with me is that I’m not there yet and no matter how much I push and shove and try to get myself there, I can’t. The short story I want to publish isn’t being published for more than just the fact that I haven’t gotten around to editing it. Those articles I want to submit to websites and magazines for publication, haven’t been sent for more than just not writing them. That one piece that is just ready for its debut hasn’t been debuted yet for more than a lack of inspiration regarding a cover design.
The real issue is that I’m not ready yet and no matter how much I talk a good game of being ready, I’m not. And a part of it has to do with the fact that me, as a person, isn’t ready more so than my work isn’t. I’m still figuring myself out.
I have vices that I need to get rid of. I have developed a lackluster persona for the sake of taking the easy way out of things. This well intended blog, meant for me to share my insights and opinions has reverted into a document marking my personal sentiments and journey. So I have work that I need to get done and that I’ve been neglecting for more reasons than I probably should.
So as much as it pains me to see others doing the things I had thought I would have been doing, I have to accept the reality that I’m not there yet and I can’t do those things until I am.
You just can’t half-ass passion for the sake of having something to show for it.