I am a writer.
But I’m not a writer for show, although, nothing would bring me greater pleasure than writing a full length novel and having people clamor to it and rave about how good it is. I mean, who wouldn’t want to be recognized for their creative talents and revered because of it. That’s the ultimate goal anyway, even if no one reads a single word that you’ve written, that you will still somehow become revered for being a writer.
But I’m a writer, which means that everyone views it as a talent worth exploiting. Don’t believe me? Check out any given freelance job search and you will find thousands of requests for writers, but not for new and aspiring talents. The only writers they want are those that will ghostwrite for them. I can’t tell you how many pages of ads I’ve gone through and found more people interested in a ghostwriter, writing out this novel for them or their life story, than actual people wanting a writer that will showcase their talents and all their creative abilities by writing a story or poem or novel to be featured in this or that.
It always amazes me how writing can be such a glamorous job and be discredited as a hobby all in the same breath. Just go and tell anyone you are a writer and not only will they rejoice over the idea of you being the very cliché of a writer, with hunched shoulders over a notebook or keyboard, typing or writing away. But then they will also wave it off as something of no importance and quickly moved the conversation on, because no matter how cliché or non-cliché you are, you can’t make an honest living as a writer, and thus it has to be a hobby and they wanted to know more about your actual career.
And that’s where I lie. I lie in the dread of admitting that I do in fact write and cringing at the responses that I receive for admitting such a thing.
I remember when I shared how I met my boyfriend through the sharing of short stories. I waited for everyone to coo or even acknowledge that besides it being so romantic, falling in love with a person over sharing your written works with each other, that they would recognize me for a writer. Instead, they glazed over that part. Of course they acknowledged the way me and my boyfriend met as cute, but the whole aspect of me being a writer was quickly dismissed.
It made me yearn for more like-minded individuals. People who also wrote and knew the struggle of having to mumble that you are a writer because to say it too loudly would either result in someone wanting you to write their paper for them or telling you that you have cute hobby and that they used to write as well. Like that time in college in which they decided to take a creative writing course and had to write short stories and poems all day. And if you are lucky, they might actually be able to dig up a piece or two for you.
Maybe that’s why I’m so crazy about this whole business proposal that I’m cooking up. I’m dying to meet my literary peers and have them meet me. I’m waiting to share stories and philosophies and writing tips with each other among other things.
I’m honestly just waiting for the moment that I can say I’m a writer and not have to worry about someone pushing their homework in my face for assistance.